What’s On Your Sexual Menu?

October 2, 2025:

Let’s talk about chicken parmesan.

Yes, chicken parm. You go to your favorite restaurant and every single time, you order the same dish. Why? Because it’s familiar, tasty, and it hits the spot.

But imagine going to that restaurant every week for years and ordering nothing but chicken parmesan. At some point, even the most delicious, cheesy plate of comfort starts to feel…meh.

Now swap out chicken parm for your typical sexual routine. You know the one: kissing, foreplay, a couple of go-to positions, orgasm, lights out. It’s your “usual.” And just like chicken parm, it probably started off exciting, felt satisfying, and became the go-to because it works.

But after a while, that sexual script can start to feel predictable, stale, and maybe even a little boring.

If any of that sounds familiar, you’re not broken. You’re not weird. There’s nothing wrong with your relationship. You’re just human. Our brains crave novelty, especially when it comes to sex and intimacy. The good news? You don’t have to throw out the chicken parm. You just need to expand the menu.

Introducing: The Sexual Menu

As a sex therapist, I often encourage clients to shift away from thinking of sex as one specific act or sequence. Instead, think of it like a menu that you get to curate and choose from.

A sexual menu offers options based on your mood, energy level, stress level, and curiosity. Some nights you might want a full three-course meal. Other times, a snack is all you’ve got in you. And sometimes, you’re just craving dessert.

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